Written on August 29, 2019 by Billy
Archive for August, 2019
Written on August 29, 2019 by Billy
Joel disproves the saying that you only regret the things you don’t do
Written on August 29, 2019 by Billy
Joel would have gotten away with it if he didn’t go back to admire his work
Written on August 29, 2019 by Billy
Joel given special privileges for his ability to cure the Tsar’s son’s hemophilia
Written on August 29, 2019 by Billy
Joel overheard calling several local costume shops in search of “bulletproof gorilla suit”
Written on August 29, 2019 by Billy
Joel discovers the dirty truth that there is no Ken Griffey Senior
Written on August 29, 2019 by Billy
Joel’s detective agency currently limited to serving Greater Tulsa
Written on August 29, 2019 by Billy
Joel scans showroom, chooses salesperson who was clearly at one point the victim of a throat slashing
Written on August 29, 2019 by Billy
Joel forced to grapple with an even nastier version of himself at high school reunion
Written on August 29, 2019 by Billy
Joel gets himself in the conversation of front-runners for town dump’s member of the year award
Written on August 29, 2019 by Billy
Joel goes into his Windows Twain32 folder and starts deleting shit when his scanner doesn’t work
Written on August 20, 2019 by admin
Joel etches Code of Hammurabi text into mirror of office bathroom
Written on August 15, 2019 by Billy
Joel studies how to open all of the current decade’s top selling cars’ trunks from the inside
Written on August 13, 2019 by Billy
Joel goes right back to hoarding hours after the camera crews and cleaning crew heads out
Written on August 12, 2019 by admin
Joel experiences theistic hysteria after an unidentified tincture leaks onto his skin
Written on August 12, 2019 by admin
Joel shows up to volunteer at women’s shelter wearing colorful leather jacket adorned with multiple state lottery logos
Written on August 9, 2019 by Billy
Joel wheeled out in jail wagon past boy selling newspapers with headline “JOEL GUILTY”
Written on August 9, 2019 by Billy
Joel accuses ER doctor of breaking Hippocratic Oath for determining he is mentally fit enough for jail in the early morning hours after destroying merchandise and harassing employee at convenience store
Written on August 9, 2019 by Billy
Joel tells 5 year old nephew “You either die a hero or live long enough to become the villain”
Written on August 9, 2019 by Billy
Joel describes himself as someone who needs to issue a lot of warnings to people
Written on August 9, 2019 by Billy
Joel operates right-leaning disinformation blog under pseudonym Little Jack Horner
Written on August 9, 2019 by Billy
Joel plunges dagger into back of man wearing toga and olive leaf crown
Written on August 9, 2019 by Billy
Joel maneuvers office beauracracy with the precision of a horny mechanical bull operator
Written on August 9, 2019 by Billy